An Anecdote about the Educators at IU

I was thinking about the way the educators at Indiana University made use of the gifts I brought to them — high GRE scores, writing ability, Ivy League law degree, Wall Street experience.  It reminded me of a story.

These two guys were talking.  One said, Hey, I’m sorry about your uncle.  The other says, Oh, it’s OK.  He’s been fading for a long time.  It was expected.

The first guy says, Well, if there’s a positive side to a funeral, at least it tends to bring the family together.

Second guy:  Yeah, it did.  That was good.  And, something unexpected:  he left me a car.

Your uncle left you a car?

Yeah.  A Volvo.

Well, yeah, that’s a plus.  What are you going to do with it?

Unfortunately, I’m going to have to junk it.  Sell it for scrap.

Oh, that’s too bad.  A junker, eh?

No, it’s actually not in terrible shape.

Bad engine, then, I guess?

No, the engine seems pretty solid.  It’s actually a pretty good car.

So — junk it.  You mean sell it.  You’re going to sell it.

Naw, I’m gonna junk it.

Well — how come?  Can’t you get something out of it?

Maybe, but I really don’t do that.

[First guy, scratching his head]:  OK, I’m missing something here.  Your uncle dies, rest his soul, and leaves you a car.  It’s a good-running Volvo.  And you’re going to junk it.  Why wouldn’t you at least try to sell it?

[Second guy, looking surprised]:  You’ve known me, what, 15 years, and you don’t know the answer to that.  Sometimes you amaze me.  I obviously can’t do anything with it.  You know my family only drives Mercedes, and this is not a Mercedes, right?

Well, yeah … it’s not a Mercedes.  But —

No buts about it.  Volvo is not a bad car.  But we just don’t deal in that sort of thing.  There’s really no alternative.

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